Thursday, May 31, 2012

I Now Pronounce You Intrusive Idiots

Same-sex marriage.


What I find so absolutely amazing is that anyone would take a millisecond out of their life to give it a second thought.

Two people are happy together, don’t give it a glance, let ‘em be happy.

As you can tell if you’ve ever taken a flatulent moment to read the drivel that comes from yours truly, there sure is a hell of a lot in this outhouse of a world to be pissed off about.

There are the standards – war, money, moronic people, smart phones, and of course, money.

Then there’s the rest of the garbage heaped onto our collective plates to devour and digest on a daily basis.

As the malodorous ooze drifts by every day, it’s a chore and a half to be able to pick out a sloppy morsel that can actually bring a smile to your face. Happiness that lasts longer than an hour is becoming as rare as the proverbial hen’s tooth.

So when you find it, and you find it with another person, crowds should cheer, bands should be struck up, awards should be awarded and parades should commence.

Instead, folks who have nothing to do with the well-being of that lucky person dizzy with delight insist on insisting that it’s wrong, wrong, wrong to find happiness with anyone who happens to share the same X or Y chromosome.

The obvious reaction would be to tell those chuckleheads to go blow sand up their ass, go back to their meaningless lives and allow people purported to be free in this country to continue being free and make their own decisions on how to live their lives and find life partners.

It seems ridiculously simple. Go look for some happiness of your own and leave these delirious strangers alone.

Does the act of two men or two women living together really annoy you that much?

Why in the world would you even care?

“The bible says it’s wrong,” those pinheads proclaim.

It does? Seems to me most of the time the bible says what you want it to say. Next to my ninth-grade calculus textbook it’s the world’s most confusing and ambiguous piece of literature, featuring tales that have been handed down from one generation to the next, with selective editing being done along the way according to the monarch in power at the time.

And by the by, isn’t it intrusive enough to tell people you don’t know how to live, you now want to tell them what to believe – according to your secular choice?

Was there an 11th commandment appointing these clowns the world’s moral conscience?

This isn’t someone’s desire to kill, cheat or lie. This is someone seeking another to share their life.

Worry about your own dismal excuse for an existence and allow those total strangers to walk down the aisle. It does you zero harm.

And if it eases your far-too-busy mind a smidgen, about half of marriages these days end in divorce anyway.


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